Waitress... Again

So, it's been a while. Here's what's going on. My Master and I are enjoying the hell out of being able to see each other almost everyday and we are taking complete advantage of it... believe me : ) The other day we spent the entire day together in my apartment, naked most of the time, having some fun with toys and whips ... hehe. Anyway...

After my last post, a week went by of trying to solve the identity problem so that I could work. The day after I thought I finally found a way around it, my new place of employment informed me that they had to take back the job offer. Of course, after everything, I was absolutely devastated.

Through some connections, about a day later I was hired as a waitress at a local restaurant. There wasn't really anyway for me to move back home because to break my lease would cost $3,200 which is what I spent to get down here in the first place. (My life savings.)

As of right now I am waitressing. After all of this it has me thinking, I didn't really want that job to begin with anyway so maybe it happened for a reason and this gives me the opportunity to take a step back and re-evaluate my life and what I really want to do with it; however, I feel like I'm a little young to be experiencing a mid-life crisis but I guess that's what happens when your at a cross-roads and reality hits you square in the face.

I'm having an interesting, growing and sometimes fun experience, but things just seem to keep happening to me which is making things hard. For example, two days ago I rear ended someone...while stopped... at a stop light... it wasn't a huge deal, but I was depressed a little that day and my emotions just exploded afterwards and yesterday I had to work a double at the restaurant with a pulled side and back muscle that I pulled somehow while I was sleeping... it hurts.

This whole experience is interesting, eye opening and forcing me to learn about myself which could be a good thing, but I am all around exhausted trying to figure out what to do.

I feel stuck, which could be a good thing or a bad thing. It's an opportunity to think about who I truly am and what I truly want in life, but then I have to pay bills and I have some things that may restrict me from trying other stuff.